Asking girls out

Valentine’s day was a few days ago and I was part of the “single guys staying at home being lonely and acting like they don’t care” club. Thank God I don’t have many Instagram followers that are in a relationship. The NBA All-Star Weekend was there to distract most guys so yay.

I tried to ask a few girls out one-on-one recently and I’ve kinda had mixed responses. Mostly bad. I’ve asked 5 girls out and only one of them agreed to go out. The other 4 agreed at first but changed their minds at the last minute. It kinda sucks because they know its purely friendship and I didn’t have any ulterior motives like spiking their drinks and selling them off to another country. The reasons didn’t even matter to me because I just took no for the answer and moved on.

Its no big deal asking girls out in the first place. However, when you get rejected too many times, you just get discouraged after awhile. I still have my football friends which I’m extremely grateful for. No matter what, they’re still guys and every guy needs women in their lives. I guess the only solution I have now is to go out and meet new people. I have no problems making new friends with guys. With girls, its tough but it takes time and effort.

I ain’t gonna give up though. 1 out of 5 girls is better than none. I’ll take that as a positive step towards achieving greatness with people. This is just a nice way of putting it LOL. Guys, don’t give up when girls reject you. If you keep trying, one of them will eventually say yes.

Loneliness

You constantly see posts on social media about people complaining that they feel lonely and wish they had attention. Be it girls or guys, most of us crave someone to care about us, to be there for us. I’m no exception. Seeing my friends getting girlfriends and boyfriends makes me feel lonely sometimes. I’m not gonna lie. I’ve always wished for someone that I could care about, and talk to whenever I need that person. 

I’ve been watching this Chinese drama series that really makes me feel emotional. The plot is about a guy born with bad luck, his parents died in a car crash and he had no brothers and sisters. He was forced to live with many relatives, all of them who rejected him because of his bad luck. Whenever they touched him, a bad thing will happen to them within 5 seconds. It’s a really horrible thing. However, he met a really good friend who stuck by him all the way. This friend was the only one unaffected by his bad luck. He also lived with a really cool relative, his distant maternal aunt who loved him a lot and took care of him. One day, he met this beautiful girl who he absolutely loved. One day, this girl fainted and he administered CPR to her. That kiss transferred all the bad luck from him to her and he received all her good luck. He became rich and his career took off. However, his relatives came back and pretended to care about him, with the motive only to glean some benefits off of him. Moreover, the girl he loved didn’t love him back. 

This really hit me like a brick. The guy gave his absolute all for her, willing to give up everything for her. Yet she didn’t love him back. It really sucks and it’s really unfair. I get emotional because of this drama series. All this guy wanted was to be with the person he loved, and yet he couldn’t even have that. He lent money to his relatives without hesitation even when he knew they were cheating him of his money. He’s an absolutely terribly nice guy.

It applies to many guys out there too. I wouldn’t say I’m the nicest guy in the world, and I do desire a person that would genuinely care about me. Call it puberty, but probably everyone will experience this sort of thing, it’s just a matter of how deep you bury this desire in your heart. It makes me really sad to see girls want to go out with guys who are badass and cool, while they ignore the nice guys who have stuck by them all along.

Putting myself in the shoes of the females, I guess I would say I’d choose the better looking guy with shades and a motorcycle. I know love can’t be forced, yet why are they attracted to the guy whom they know it’s not gonna end well. Why?

I can never have the answer to this question. Love is a complex system which there is no straightforward formula to follow. Do you have the answer?

Confession

Did you ever wonder why I went so quiet that day? I don’t know if u noticed but I was super quiet. I was terrified. For the first time in my life, I’ve never been so terrified. I’ve never ever felt this way about someone before. 

When you took the stuffed rabbit from me, the emotion on your face was priceless. I can never forget that expression. It was a picture perfect moment. I could barely look you in the eyes as you exclaimed how cute the stuffed rabbit was. A wave of emotion squeezed my heart and my blood pressure rose. It was confusing.

When you told me you needed to leave, I panicked. I didn’t want to show it, but I didn’t want you to leave. Time and distance kept us apart for months, I only asked for a day from you. I was usually okay with people making changes in their plans for meeting me, but never like this. I almost seemed clingy, and I am even more confused.

The conversations after that were like a dream. My body seemed to be present but yet my mind seemed to have drifted off to some unknown place. I was present with you, yet I wasn’t. You were controlling the conversation, something I was doing at first and yet u took that away from me. I was confused. I have never felt this emotion before. It hurt. It’s hurting real bad.

It’s been 2 days and I miss that infectious bubbly laughter. That cute little smile that makes my heart melt. No girl has ever made me sleepless for 2 nights in a row. As long as I don’t see you, sleep has run away from me. 

I’m confused. I don’t know what to do. Yet when I heard you’re gonna hang out with my best friend, this emotion raged inside me. I can’t stop pacing about. I’m restless. I can’t stop thinking. What have you done to me? Why have you done this to me?

Now I know. 

I really really really really really really like you, and I want you. I’m hurting, I’m broken down and I need you right now. No girl has made me feel this way before. You’re special to me. So please, will you be mine?